hi. i'm lesa kochecki. i'm 42 and 18 at the same time. i think i'm going through a mid-life crisis.

i wrote this when i was falling to sleep. it's so strange what just goes from brain to hands to keyboard when you're dozing off or right when you wake up--like the odd boundary between dreams and reality. i certainly hope this isn't my reality--but i was thinking a lot about middle age, and about how people say that they never really grow up, they just literally grow out. and this is the beginning snippet of a story. i hope a good story. but a very messy one too.

Lesa Kocheckie: age Middle. sitting reading a janet evanovich book in bed under a qvc ordered booklight that clips to the page.she has cotton balls in her ear so her husband's snoring, despite breathing machine and nose strips, won't disturb her. her husband's arm is draped over her forearm and she has to avoid it to turn the pages of her book.
"Get your arm off of me. No I know that your left arm always has to be draped over me when you go to sleep at night or it’ll fall asleep and then blah blah youll lose circulation and die. You big oaf. I don’t smack you in the face for having that loud breathing machine and disrupting my dreams of making out with george clooney. The least you could do was keep your arm on your side of the bed and not resting on me.
I have to pee"
Lesa kocheckie flings her husbands arm over his stomach and gets up, goes ot the bathroom, flips on the switch and we see a middle aged woman with showing roots in a tigger nightshirt and her husbands boxers. She squnches up her face and makes an o face to smooth out wrinkles. She pulls back her face and turns to the side sucking in her cheeks. After peeing she gets on the scale and weighs herself, looking away. The scale reads 142.
"Excellent. Just fantastic. The last two digits are my age. Damnit. I guess I've reached the golden weight."

i feel awkward writing that because i have no idea what it feels like to be middle aged. weird. i even had to invent a word--squnch. noice. it'll be in webster's with "bootylicious" someday. one can only hope.